There is a stark contrast between what each of the sexes thinks the opposite sex wants from them, and what the opposite sex really does want.
What women think men want from them causes women to have resentments and anger towards men, and feel hopeless about ever developing a wonderful, warm romantic partnership. What men think women want from them causes them much of the same feelings, and will be covered in our next newsletter.
The sad part is that it does not have to be this way, if only we realize that both men and women are human beings first and pretty much want the same thing. You don’t have to take my word for this. Below are the answers of six men to the question “What do you want from a woman in order to build a great relationship?” contrasted with what women think men want on the same topic.
Below are also tips for women how to give men what they want, attract a great man and create a wonderful relationship.
Bare in mind all six men are actively involved in personal growth and development.
Top Six Things Men Want From Women in Order to Build a Satisfying Relationship
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1. Men want honest, timely, loving communication All of the men in my survey said honest communication was top priority. They said they want a woman who answers questions honestly instead of with silence. They also said they want a woman who confidently asks for her wants and needs to be met. They want a woman who can see the truth, and tell it like it is while communicating with kindness. Finally, men want a woman who can communicate without being too critical, who cares about preserving his and her dignity.What women think men want
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Women think men want them to be superficial, to never bring up needs or wants, to never ask for anything. Women think men believe them to be too needy and to sensitive, and that men simply want women to get over it. Some women believe they do not have the permission to tell it like it is, that they will be rejected for speaking up.Tip for women:
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Great men want and need straightforward, courageous communication without anger or criticism. Therefore, one way to attract a great man and build a satisfying relationship is to learn how to communicate effectively.2. Self-sufficiency, security, confidence Men said they want a woman to choose them rather than need them, either materially or emotionally. They said they want their partner to have a separate identity, to support his goals without being threatened because she has goals as well. Men said they want a woman to be active and independent, and to have her own friends and interests.What women think men want
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Women think men want them to not need them. Women think that men do not need or appreciate time spent together as a couple. Women believe that showing a man he is needed will turn him off and possibly make him run away.Tip for women:
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Men want what women want – a whole partner. One powerful way to attract a great man and to build a vibrant relationship is to create a full, rewarding life for your own fulfillment now.3. Lack of manipulation Men said they want no manipulation of any kind. They do not want to read their partner’s mind or try to interpret signals. They do not want to be forced to move faster in a relationship than they are ready. They do not want to be manipulated into taking all the blame for things gone wrong. They do not want to be on the receiving end of game playing.What women think men want
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Women think men want no communication, and the only way to get needs met is through manipulation. Women think men either need or want to be reminded the relationship needs to move forward. Women think men don’t want or value praise and acknowledgement, and so tend to only verbalize criticism.Tip for women:
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Men will not tolerate manipulation of any kind. To attract a great man and to build a wonderful relationship, learn to ask without hesitation for what you want and need in every area of your life. Learn to be aware of his timing and his timeline. Learn how to acknowledge and bestow praise.4. Growth, personal responsibility, ownership Men said they want a partner who can laugh at herself, and who has the ability to build courage and strength in her partner which means she must have the ability to do the same for herself. They also said they want a woman who can see her part in relationship dynamics and own it. She has to be stable emotionally. Men want a woman who is developing herself personally, and who takes responsibility for her emotional experience.What women think men want
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Women think men only want to have a good time. Women think men have no interest in developing and growing a relationship or developing and growing themselves. Women think men want women who are super models, but never consider if a woman is emotionally mature, kind, supportive, loving.Tip for women:
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Men want women who are emotionally mature. Maturity does not mean lack of emotions. It does mean the ability to handle emotions responsibly. To attract a great man and to build a long-term relationship, learn to take responsibility for your emotional expression and experience.5. Fidelity and a commitment to the relationship Across the board, men said fidelity is an absolute must. In fact, most went even further to say they want a woman who does not have a “roaming eye” and who can wholeheartedly commit to the relationship. They went on to define commitment as fidelity plus the willingness to work on the relationship even when the going gets tough. They said such commitment is critical to create a great relationship.What women think men want
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Women think that all men want is sex and will leave a relationship for the next prettier face. Women think men cannot be trusted to be faithful. Women believe men do not want to work on a relationship, that when the going gets tough, they run.Tip for women:
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Here is great news for those women who have resigned to the myth that all men cheat: infidelity and “a roaming eye” are as distasteful to men as they are to women. Great men know how to build a wonderful relationship, and know that fidelity is the main ingredient.6. Knowledge of men and how they need to be treated Only two men said this outright, but most implied it. It seems women tend to treat men in a way that diminishes their ego, making them feel inadequate. Men said they would rather have more praise, more acknowledgement of what they do right, more acknowledgment that they are great guys who are loved and appreciated.What women think men want
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Women think men do not need them, do not value their opinion, their support, their praise. Women also think men do not care about many things important to women, which is why they criticize. Criticism is a way to verbalize resentment.Tip for women:
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Most men want acknowledgement and appreciation from women. Learning to acknowledge instead of making your partner wrong is one of the most powerful relationship survival tools available to you.Your Relationship Coach,
Rinatta Paries===============================================
This article was originally published by Coach Rinatta Paries in The Relationship Coach Newsletter, a weekly e-zine for people who want fulfilling relationships. For singles, the newsletter will help you attract your Mr. or Ms. Right. If you’re in a relation- ship, learn to create much more closeness and intimacy with your mate. To subscribe, go to http://www.WhatItTakes.com
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